the big chill

By amy ~ January 14th, 2009 @ 9:09 am

amy29sqsepAs the mornings get colder and brighter, the evenings resonate with biting winds and the cars outside are covered with glittering swirls of frost an hour after dark, it is evident that winter is truly upon us and although the last couple of days have taken a definite turn for the mild(ish), I have been in very real danger of succumbing to that comforting form of self-imposed hibernation which is so tempting when the wind blazes outside and the pavements are dangerously slippy for the unwary and impractically-shod.

Needless to say, I have taken appropriate steps to ensure that the comfort of my visitors is not compromised. The central heating has been permanently on (albeit low) since before the weekend plus (needless to say) there is unlimited extra heat on offer once a desirably friendly level of proximity is achieved – I must however admit that my upcoming visit to Budapest will undoubtedly make Scarborough appear like the Amalfi coast, and as such have resourcefully photocopied maps from my library-obtained guidebook and marked out carefully (and at sensible intervals) places where soup and dumplings are sold, as well as the more usual places of interest. There are many things to like about the city and I will report back on my return, having been thermally bathed, stodgily fed and continentally-beered into pleasing oblivion.

To follow on from (and in contrast to, although the sentiment is very much the same) my letter from our local MP a couple of weeks ago, I have also received a brief but charming email from the rather dashing and flamboyant Sebastian Horsley following a brief note I sent him following his bizarrely agreeing to be the token punter on a daytime television programme several weeks ago. This appearance was rendered all the more hilarious when Sebastian was earnestly presented as a ‘typical’ client, and whilst our erstwhile Home Secretary noticeably scarpered during the commercial break (before things got interesting) his in turn haughty and mischievous responses to the gravely-put but wholly ill-informed questions about brothels and trafficking made my day a far brighter one (not least because I have never before seen Philip Schofield look quite so uncomfortable).

Hello darling,

Do you think we have met before? Has money changed hands?

I took the view that I would see it purely as theatre. The incongruous effect of a classic surrealist juxtaposition – the umbrella on the operating table. As a dada artwork. Oh and they paid me ha ha.

Also I get so sick of people like you being patronised. It makes me sick the way people see the industry and it is time people spoke out. This trafficking stuff is complete rubbish. Where are these women? Why don’t they say anything? What about the parents? Are we to belive that all these people have just vanished off the face of the earth and the parents have said nothing?

Prostitutes do not deserve our pity, out punishments or our prayers. They deserve our respect.

Best Wishes


I would like to point out that Sebastian and I have not met (although I do have a good number of clients from Hull, I’m fairly sure I would have remembered).

As some of you are aware, my birthday is approaching – I have never felt the need to fib about my age and will be altering my advertising accordingly; I cannot understand why anyone would purport to be younger than they clearly are and my appearance is often a source of pleasant surprise to those who have met some less-than-candid ’35 year olds’ who turn out to be in fact a far more dignified age! Nevertheless, I will soon be thirty six, a pleasant and middling age for all, and as far as I am concerned, a long way off from retirement! Rest assured, I plan to be around for a quite a while…

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1 Response to the big chill

  1. Leeds escort agency

    “Prostitutes do not deserve our pity, out punishments or our prayers. They deserve our respect.”

    Absolutely spot on. It’s a job like any other.


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